DROP OUT, OBAMA?

By Chris Wilson

Even as Hillary Clinton trails Barack Obama in pledged delegates, the popular vote, and number of states won, she has made it clear that she plans to stay in the race for the nomination. All of which brings me to this logical conclusion: It is time for Barack Obama to drop out.

If Clinton had the good of the Democratic Party in mind, she would have given up her bid the day after the Mississippi primary, which Obama won by 25 points. The delegate math was as dismal for her campaign then as it is now, even after Pennsylvania, and she was facing down a six-week gulf before the next election.

But Hillary Clinton isn’t going to drop out. There simply isn’t a function in her assembly code for throwing in the towel.

Obama, on the other hand, is fully capable of it. And if he’s really serious about representing a new kind of politics, now is the time for him to prove it in the only meaningful way left. Moreover, were he to play it right, dropping out now nearly guarantees that he’ll be elected president in 2012. Here’s the roadmap:

Obama drops out next week, stating that although he could almost certainly win the nomination by fighting it out until the convention in August, he is simply not willing to drag the party through a battle that will cripple its chances against John McCain. He then pledges to help support Sen. Clinton in her bid—with full knowledge that she will not take him up on the offer.

In one stroke, Obama will regain his messiah creds by making the ultimate sacrifice for the good of the party. His followers will be furious. The mere mention of Clinton’s name will provoke unspeakable acts. They will abandon Clinton in numbers sufficient to hand McCain the election in November.

Losing the presidency again after eight years of Bush will ruin the Democratic Party. It will become obvious that Clinton’s decision to stay in the race was the turning point in the election. The base will turn its wrath on party leaders like Howard Dean and Nancy Pelosi, who failed to push Clinton out. Obama, as the de facto head of the party, will broker negotiations to install new leaders loyal to him.

McCain will be eminently more beatable in 2012. Demographics will continue to shift in Obama’s favor as his 14- to 17-year-old supporters come of voting age. Anyone foolish enough to challenge Obama for the nomination—and don’t rule out Clinton—will go nowhere. Obama’s utopian vision for a Democratic party unified around him will be complete. QED.

Published Thursday, April 24, 2008 11:52 AM

HUMAN RACE - FAMILY HISTORY

A little girl asked her mother, "How did the human race appear?" The mother answered, "God made Adam and Eve and they had children and so all mankind was made." Two days later the girl asked her father the same question.

The father answered, "Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved."

The confused girl returned to her mother and said, "Mom, howis it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Dad said they developed from monkeys?" The mother answered, "Well, dear, it is very simple ..."

"I told you about my side of the family and your father told you about his."

Easter Bunny Humor

A man is driving along a highway and sees a rabbit jump out across the middle of the road.
He swerves to avoid hitting it, but unfortunately the rabbit jumps right in front of the car. The driver, a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulls over and gets out to seewhat has become of the rabbit.

Much to his dismay, the rabbit is the Easter Bunny, and he is DEAD .The driver feels so awful that he begins to cry.

A beautiful blonde woman driving down the highwaysees a man crying on the side of the road and pulls over.She steps out of the car and asks the manwhat's wrong. 'I feel terrible,' ! he explains,'I accidentally hit the Easter Bunny with my car and KILLED HIM.'

The blonde says,'Don't worry.' She runs to her car and pulls out a spray can. She walks over to the limp, dead Easter Bunny, bends down, and sprays the contents onto him.

The Easter Bunny jumps up,waves its paw at the two of them and hops off down the road.Ten feet away he stops, turns around and waves again, he hops down the road another 10 feet, turns and waves, hops another ten feet, turns and waves, and repeats this again and again and again and again, until he hops out of sight.

The man is astonished. He runs over to the woman and demands, 'What is in that can? What did you spray on the Easter Bunny ?' The woman turns the can around so that the man can read the label. It says... (Are you ready for this?)(Are you sure?) (You know you're gonna be sorry) (Last chance)(OK, here it is)

It says,'Hair Spray: Restores life to dead hair, and adds a permanent wave.'

Happy Easter!!!

PURPLE Beverage Stock (PPBV) is the Next Pepsi

You can check out this product on their website at http://www.drinkpurple.com/

Purple is the next Pepsi – which made $Millionaires last century Early PPBV shareholders can be this century’s newest $Millionaires Purple (PPBV) is the next beverage stock to follow in the direct path of some of America’s most profitable stock stories including PepsiCo, Snapple, and Hansen Natural. While we can’t travel back to 1980 and buy PepsiCo (PEP: NYSE) below $5 – I’m going to show you how to become immensely wealthy today with an early position in Purple Beverage (PPBV) up to $3.

A Perfect Profit-Storm is Brewing: PPBV just commenced public trading in December — the company’s flagship “Purple” beverage is gaining momentum on all fronts — I’m projecting PPBV’s initial sales figures to be multiples above current estimates — PPBV shares are heading MUCH HIGHER.

As a valuable member of my Internal Audience, you are first to receive my early buy-instruction on PPBV up to the $3.00 level. The investing herd won’t know about Purple until their brokers recommend it above $10!

Purple is about to begin its first major upward price-move to the $10 - $15 range — Make sure you own this stock NOW at its initial price-range below $3.

The U.S. Beverage Sector is where $Millionaire Investors are Made!
If you missed out on PepsiCo, Hansen’s, and Snapple — Purple Beverage (PPBV) is YOUR Second Chance at Historic Profits

Each and every one of us grew up drinking Pepsi but few of us bought PepsiCo stock in its infancy. Of course, the company is now one of the greatest success stories in American history with over $100 BILLION in annual sales – and those foresighted investors who jumped in early are now $Millionaires many times over.

Hansen Natural (HANS: Nasdaq) has taken Top Honor on the list of the “Market’s 10 Best Stocks” the last three years running and has returned an incredible 21,201% from 1998 to 2007. Early Snapple investors walked away with a colossal payday in 2000 as the company was purchased by Cadbury Schweppes for around $1.45 Billion. Similarly, Dr Pepper/Seven Up was bought out for $1.7 Billion in 1995.

Purple (PPBV) is Set to become the Most Profitable Beverage Stock of All-Time
During my early years as a Wall Street broker, I followed the incredible stock-performance of U.S. beverage titans like Hansen Natural and Dr Pepper/Seven Up.

Now, as the Profit-Proven Master of Contrarian Investing – I work directly for YOU: I’m bringing you Purple Beverage (PPBV) today – before everyone else – well below the $3.00 per share level. I cannot stress enough – You must buy this stock BEFORE the company releases its initial sales numbers. DO NOT hesitate on this one!

What’s the Secret behind Purple’s New Antioxidant Beverage? Who Cares…as long as it makes YOU RICH!

Did you have any stock-market losses in 2007? Purple Beverage (PPBV) is the ONE stock you can buy today below $3 and immediately make up for of those losses along with an opportunity to amass your first stock-market fortune of 2008 as Purple increases its share of the booming $40 Billion-plus specialty beverage sector.

Important: Purple is NOT in the product-development stage! The company’s hot-new antioxidant beverage is on U.S. store shelves NOW – and GNC, the world’s largest specialty retailer of nutritional products, is set to feature Purple in select stores nationwide beginning this month.

PPBV continues to break its own records for vendor requests to carry Purple – which means YOU have an opportunity to be an early PPBV investor Right Now - at the beginning stages of the company’s major expansion.

FACT: America is the undisputed “KING” of soft-drinks and specialty beverages with PepsiCo and Coca Cola leading the way – each commanding market-caps above the $100 BILLION mark. PepsiCo became an industry dominator because of its refreshing soft-drinks AND catchy marketing campaigns.

Purple Beverage (PPBV) is led by industry veterans who understand the importance of both, and early PPBV investors can take added comfort in knowing that PepsiCo legend Michael K. Lorelli is now spearheading Purple’s look and feel to the American consumer. With such marketing talent at the helm, PPBV shares could make their projected move toward $100 much sooner than expected!

Drink Purple – Get Rich with Purple Shares!

All signals are in-place for an epic profit-ride with Purple Beverage. The company’s products are storming onto U.S. store-shelves, and the giant media conglomerates – including CNBC, ABC’s The View, Forbes and SmartMoney – are starting to run with the Purple story.

Obama Answers: "Why Should I Vote For You?"

This Month Remember Your Five Black Presidents

We keep hearing that this year will mark the first time a major political party in the United States nominated a woman or a Black person as its presidential candidate. For women, that is true, but some historians say Sen. Barack Obama, if elected, would not be the nation's first Black president. They say he certainly won't be the first president with Black ancestors--just the first to acknowledge his Blackness.


Which other presidents hid their African ancestry? Well, it's not Bill Clinton, even though the Congressional Black Caucus honored him as the nation's "first Black president" at its 2001 annual awards dinner. Presidents Thomas Jefferson, Andrew Jackson, Abraham Lincoln, Warren Harding and Calvin Coolidge all had Black ancestors they kept in their genealogical closets, according to historians.


Harding did not deny his African ancestry when Republican leaders called on him to deny his "Negro" history. He said, "How should I know whether or not one of my ancestors might have jumped the fence?"


Does African ancestry make these men Black? If the bar is the one-drop rule, then yes. The one-drop rule is a historical term used during the Jim Crow era that defines a person with one drop of sub-Saharan-African ancestry as not white and therefore must be Black. If that's the bar, then there have already been other Black presidents, says historian Leroy Vaughn, author of Black People and Their Place in World History.


The first president with African ancestry was Jefferson, who served two terms between 1801 and 1809. Jefferson was described as the "son of a half-breed Indian squaw and a Virginia mulatto father," as stated in Vaughn's findings. Jefferson also was said to have destroyed all documentation attached to his mother, even going to extremes to seize letters written by his mother to other people.


President Andrew Jackson, the nation's seventh president, was in office between 1829 and 1837. Vaughn cites an article written in The Virginia Magazine of History that states Jackson was the son of an Irish woman who married a Black man. The magazine also stated that Jackson's oldest brother had been sold as a slave.


Lincoln, the nation's 16th president, served between 1861 and 1865. Lincoln was said to have been the illegitimate son of an African man, according to Vaughn's findings. Lincoln had very dark skin and coarse hair and his mother allegedly came from an Ethiopian tribe. His heritage fueled so much controversy that Lincoln was nicknamed "Abraham Africanus the First" by his opponents.


President Warren Harding, the 29th president, in office between 1921 and 1923, apparently never denied his ancestry. According to Vaughn, William Chancellor, a professor of economics and politics at Wooster College in Ohio, wrote a book on the Harding family genealogy. Evidently, Harding had Black ancestors between both sets of parents. Chancellor also said that Harding attended Iberia College, a school founded to educate fugitive slaves.


Coolidge, the nation's 30th president, served between 1923 and 1929 and supposedly was proud of his heritage. He claimed his mother was dark because of mixed Indian ancestry. Coolidge's mother's maiden name was "Moor," and in Europe, the name "Moor" was given to all Blacks, just as "Negro" was used in America. It later was concluded that Coolidge was part Black.

North American Union & Vchip Truth

Check out this video on YouTube regarding "The North American Union & Vchip Truth ... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vuBo4E77ZXo It's a real eye-opener!

Obama - Our First Muslim President?

Our First Muslim President?
by Robert Spencer

The Los Angeles Times reported recently that
Barack Obama’s campaign seems to be modifying
its earlier affirmation that “Senator Obama has
never been a Muslim, was not raised a Muslim, and
is a committed Christian who attends the United
Church of Christ in Chicago.”

In a statement to the Times, the campaign offered
slightly different wording, saying: “Obama has
never been a practicing Muslim.” The statement
added that as a child, Obama had spent time in the
neighborhood’s Islamic center.

His former Roman Catholic and Muslim teachers,
along with two people who were identified by
Obama’s grade-school teacher as childhood friends,
say Obama was registered by his family as a Muslim
at both of the schools he attended.

The Cartoon Rage and Pope Rage riots were orchestrated
from above. The people who orchestrated them
know enough not to shoot themselves in the foot.
They (as well as Obama’s campaign) have a chance
here to portray Obama as someone who was raised as
a Muslim and thus has a keen understanding of the
Islamic world and the Islamic mind — rather like the
positioning of Bill Clinton as our “first black
President.” Muslim leaders worldwide will not be
saying, “He was raised a Muslim. Isn’t that terrible?”
They’re more likely to say, “He was raised a Muslim.
Isn’t that wonderful? At last, someone who can see
our point of view.” Given Obama’s politics, it will not
be hard to present him internationally as someone
who understands Islam and Muslims, and thus will be
able to smooth over the hostility between the Islamic
world and the West — our first Muslim President.

Barack Obama’s Muslim upbringing could
become the linchpin of an attempt to present him as
the only candidate who can end the war on terror.
We can only hope that, if he does become President,
he won’t propose to do this only by means of various
varieties of appeasement.

Mr. Spencer is director of Jihad Watch and author of The
Politically Incorrect Guide to Islam (and the Crusades)
and The Truth About Muhammad (both from Regnery
— a HUMAN EVENTS sister company).

McCain vs. Obama

One McCain Adviser Says He Can't Bear Thought of Going Up Against Barack Obama

Thursday , February 14, 2008
By Brit Hume

Bailing Out

John McCain's chief media adviser is suggesting he will quit the campaign — rather than work against Barack Obama.

Mark McKinnon was a Democrat before working for President Bush's campaign in 2000 and 2004.

He tells National Public Radio — "I would simply be uncomfortable being in a campaign that would be inevitably attacking Barack Obama. I think it would be uncomfortable for me, and I think it would be bad for the McCain campaign."

McKinnon says while he disagrees with Obama on fundamental issues, he likes him a great deal. He says he will still support McCain — but only from the sidelines.

Quick Turnaround

That Portsmouth, New Hampshire landlord we told you about last week who was stiffed by the Clinton campaign for office rent has now been paid — and he's giving the money to Barack Obama. Terry Bennett tells the Portsmouth Herald he was overnighted a check after the story got out. He says he is giving the money to Obama because when Clinton's campaign workers left his office in a big mess — and didn't pay — that was the last straw.

And Bennett apparently wasn't the only business owner to get stiffed. The Herald reports a man who owns a cleaning service in Des Moines, Iowa says the campaign skipped out on a $7,500 bill. The Clinton campaign says everyone who provided a service will be paid — and that these two cases were "isolated delays."

Paying a Price

Southern Baptist Minister Wiley Drake says he is being investigated by the IRS for endorsing Mike Huckabee in a press release written on church stationery. Drake is the pastor of First Southern Baptist Church in Buena Park, California. He says the IRS sent him a 14-page letter earlier this month following a complaint by the Americans United for Separation of Church and State.

Federal tax law states church officials may not endorse candidates or parties without putting their tax-exempt status at risk. drake says he was only offering his personal endorsement — not that of the church.

Heart Less

And folks in Saudi Arabia looking for Valentine's Day gifts this week were pretty much out of luck — because of a national ban on all red gift items. Undercover Islamic religious police have been going around forcing shops to stop selling red roses and other such gifts. The Muslim authorities say Valentine's Day is a pagan Christian holiday that promotes sin and encourages relationships out of wedlock.

Other Muslim-controlled areas are not so sure. valentine's day items are available in bahrain, kuwait, and dubai, among others.

— FOX News Channel's Martin Hill contributed to this report.

Valentine's Day

Happy Valentines Day! Valentine's Day is a day celebrated by many all over the country, but how many of you know it’s true origins? Please read on:

The Silence of Educators

Teachers are all too often silent about the origin of the customs they are forced to teach in today’s schools! If they were to speak out, many would lose their jobs!

Isn’t it time we examined why we encourage our children to celebrate St. Valentine’s Day - when it is never mentioned in the Bible as a practice of the New Testament Church?
Today, candymakers unload tons of heart-shaped red boxes for February 14, while millions of the younger set are annually exchanging valentines. Florists consider February 14 - St. Valentine’s Day - as one of their best business days. And young lovers pair off - at least for a dance or two - at St. Valentine’s balls. Why? Where did these customs originate? Where do we find any such practices in the Bible? How did we come to inherit these customs?

A Christian Custom?

Did you know that centuries before Christ, the pagan Romans celebrated February 15 and the evening of February 14 as an idolatrous and sensuous festival in honor of Lupercus, the “hunter of wolves”?

The Romans called the festival the “Lupercalia.” The custom of exchanging valentines and all the other traditions in honor of Lupercus - the deified hero-hunter of Rome- was also linked anciently with the pagan practice of teen-agers “going steady.” It usually led to fornication. Today, the custom of “going steady” is thought very modern. It isn’t. It is merely a rebirth of an old custom “handed down from the Roman festival of the Lupercalia, celebrated in the month of February, when names of young women were put into a box and drawn out by men as chance directed.” That’s the admission of the Encyclopedia Americana, article, “St. Valentine’s Day.”

When Constantine made Christianity the official religion of the Roman Empire there was some talk in church circles of discarding this pagan free-for-all. But the Roman citizens wouldn’t hear of it! So it was agreed that the holiday would continue as it was, except for the more grossly sensual observances.

It was not until the reign of Pope Gelasius that the holiday became a “Christian” custom. ” As far back as 496, Pope Gelasius changed Lupercalia on February 15 to St. Valentine’s Day on February 14.” (p. 172 of Customs and Holidays Around the World by Lavinia Dobler).
But how did this pagan festival acquire the name of “St. Valentine’s Day”? And why is the little naked Cupid of the pagan Roman so often associated today with February 14? And why do little children and young people still cut out hearts and send them on a day in honor of Lupercus the hunter of wolves? Why have we supposed these pagan customs in honor of a false god are Christians?

Color Psychology

Colors often have different meanings in various cultures. And even in Western societies, the meanings of various colors have changed over the years. But today in the U.S., researchers have generally found the following to be accurate.

Black

Black is the color of authority and power. It is popular in fashion because it makes people appear thinner. It is also stylish and timeless. Black also implies submission. Priests wear black to signify submission to God. Some fashion experts say a woman wearing black implies submission to men. Black outfits can also be overpowering, or make the wearer seem aloof or evil. Villains, such as Dracula, often wear black.

White

Brides wear white to symbolize innocence and purity. White reflects light and is considered a summer color. White is popular in decorating and in fashion because it is light, neutral, and goes with everything. However, white shows dirt and is therefore more difficult to keep clean than other colors. Doctors and nurses wear white to imply sterility.

Red

The most emotionally intense color, red stimulates a faster heartbeat and breathing. It is also the color of love. Red clothing gets noticed and makes the wearer appear heavier. Since it is an extreme color, red clothing might not help people in negotiations or confrontations. Red cars are popular targets for thieves. In decorating, red is usually used as an accent. Decorators say that red furniture should be perfect since it will attract attention.

The most romantic color, pink, is more tranquilizing. Sports teams sometimes paint the locker rooms used by opposing teams bright pink so their opponents will lose energy.

Blue

The color of the sky and the ocean, blue is one of the most popular colors. It causes the opposite reaction as red. Peaceful, tranquil blue causes the body to produce calming chemicals, so it is often used in bedrooms. Blue can also be cold and depressing. Fashion consultants recommend wearing blue to job interviews because it symbolizes loyalty. People are more productive in blue rooms. Studies show weightlifters are able to handle heavier weights in blue gyms.

Green

Currently the most popular decorating color, green symbolizes nature. It is the easiest color on the eye and can improve vision. It is a calming, refreshing color. People waiting to appear on TV sit in "green rooms" to relax. Hospitals often use green because it relaxes patients. Brides in the Middle Ages wore green to symbolize fertility. Dark green is masculine, conservative, and implies wealth. However, seamstresses often refuse to use green thread on the eve of a fashion show for fear it will bring bad luck.

Yellow

Cheerful sunny yellow is an attention getter. While it is considered an optimistic color, people lose their tempers more often in yellow rooms, and babies will cry more. It is the most difficult color for the eye to take in, so it can be overpowering if overused. Yellow enhances concentration, hence its use for legal pads. It also speeds metabolism.

Purple

The color of royalty, purple connotes luxury, wealth, and sophistication. It is also feminine and romantic. However, because it is rare in nature, purple can appear artificial.

Brown

Solid, reliable brown is the color of earth and is abundant in nature. Light brown implies genuineness while dark brown is similar to wood or leather. Brown can also be sad and wistful. Men are more apt to say brown is one of their favorite colors.

Bipolar Patients - Increased Risk of Metabolic Syndrome

Bipolar Patients are at Increased Risk of Metabolic Syndrome

Spanish researchers have found that people with bipolar disorder face an increased risk of developing the metabolic syndrome. In the past, metabolic syndrome was also found to be more common in schizophrenia.

The metabolic syndrome is a common mix of connected problems, which include obesity, high blood pressure, obesity, diabetes/insulin resistance, and high cholesterol levels. These problems are important, because they markedly increase a person's risk of heart attacks and strokes.
Researchers studied 194 patients with bipolar disorder. Half the participants were not experiencing depression or mania symptoms at the time of the study. Overall, 22% of the bipolar patients met the criteria for the metabolic syndrome, which is higher than is found in the general population.

Writing in the Journal of Affective Disorders, Dr Garcia-Portilla and team conclude: "Our results confirm the high prevalence of the metabolic syndrome in patients with bipolar disorder, 60% higher than that reported for the general Spanish population."

Although doctors will normally screen for this problem as part of a general check up, this study shows that the distiction between physical and psychological illnesses is often only in the doctor's mind.

Hillary Clinton Facts

Here are some interesting, fun facts that I found on Uncyclopedia about our former first lady and 2008 Democratic candidate, Hillary Clinton. Very interesting …

Predictions

Anonymous sourcers predict that she will win the white house, dump the philanderer in ex-chief, then be courted by royalties and principalities from around the world. She will be so busy dating heads of states that the US will enjoy unprecedented favors from her suitors the world over. She will make history not only for being the first divorced female president of the free world, but for lowering the price of oil to $2.50 a barrel when she marries the sensible prince of Saudi Arabia (prince what’s his name)

Love of Satan

Hillary Clinton is in fact the Anti-Christ sent by the Dark Prince to destroy man. Panda bears are her evil minions.

Ms. Clinton is also known for for her ability to cheat death by transferring her soul into a host body. It is believed that it is she who has taught Bill Clinton, Hitler, Karl Marx, Lord Sauron, Stalin, Emperor Palpatine, Dick Cheney, Joan Rivers, Lord Voldemort, Dr. Doom, Dante, Marie Antoinette, Donald Trump, Regis Philbin, satan himself and Hoenheim of Light how to transmute their souls out of their bodies and into different host bodies. Some scholars argue that Hillary’s odds-thrashing survival comes from being so nicely enclosed in the snug confines of media conglomerates, who feed her a strictly regulated diet consisting of DRM and RIAA Burgers.

10 Things You Should Never Say to a Guy

1) ”That looks cute.”For the most part, men hate cute. We don’t want to hear about it, we don’t want to see it, and we sure as hell don’t want to be it. If we come down stairs after getting dressed and you tell us we look cute, there’s a 100 percent chance we’re changing. We’re supposed to be your protector, your rock, and cute does not fit into that picture.

2) ”We need to talk.” These four words shut off a man’s brain faster than long division. When men hear you say that they immediately go into flight mode. And anything they can do to get out of this conversation—and better yet, your apartment—they will. There are plenty of other ways to approach a delicate conversation, and getting us in a place where we feel comfortable is a good start.

3) ”It’s just a game.” Actually, it’s not just a game. Sports are a major part of our lives and the outcome has as much to do with our mood as just about anything else. Is it fair? No. Is it right? No. Is it immature? Maybe. But it’s life. Sometimes we just care too much. We understand that it doesn’t make sense, but you should be happy that we’re that passionate about something. Telling us that “it’s just a game” is like us telling you that Oprah’s just a talk show host.

4) ”Nothing’s wrong.” Please don’t tell us nothing’s wrong. The look on your face could make the toughest guy on the planet weep like a third-grade girl and your arms are crossed so tight you might explode. We’re not mind readers; tell us what’s going on. And don’t make us guess because—believe me—you won’t like what we come up with.

5) ”I sound like my mom.” The mere fact that you might turn into your mom someday scares the hell out of us. Don’t say it, even in jest—it’s not funny. We actually believe (and pray) that the saying “every woman ends up looking like their mother” is an old wives’ tale. If we didn’t, no one would ever get married.

6) ”I just want to be friends.”No you don’t. You just want us to stop calling you. This is a lot like pulling off a band-aid. Do it quick—don’t prolong the agony. Most of us take “I just want to be friends” as “There’s still a chance,” so if there isn’t just make it a clean break and move on. Everyone will be much better because of it.

7) ”Size doesn’t matter.” Don’t lie to us. We know it does, and we’re doing our best to make up for it in other ways. It’s best just to not say anything at all.

8) ”What are you wearing?”We’re wearing whatever’s clean or whatever you tell us to. We don’t plan out our wardrobe days in advance, but we do actually try and look presentable. It may not work a lot of the time, but we do give it a shot. Giving us direction is completely encouraged though, so go ahead and suggest … nicely.

9) ”Do you think she’s pretty?” Of course we do, our standards are much lower than yours. But just because we check her out doesn’t mean we think any less of you. We try to be as discreet as possible, but for the most part, we can’t help it. It’s in our DNA. When an attractive woman walks by, it’s best to just pretend nothing happened.

10) ”Which outfit do you like better?” I’m going to be honest here—90 percent of the guys out there are not going to tell you which outfit they like better: They’re going to try to pick the one you like better and not get into a holy war when the babysitter is due any minute. To us, you always look good. Getting a couple cocktails and spending as much time as we can without the kids is our ultimate goal for a rare night out.

Blonde Joke

A blind man wanders into an all girls biker bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders some coffee.

After sitting there for awhile, he yells to the waiter, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?" The bar immediately falls absolutely silent.

In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it is only fair---given that you are blind---that you should know five things:

1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
2. The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3. I'm a 6 foot tall, 175 lb. blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weightlifter.
5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.

Now, think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"

The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, and mutters, "No...not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."

If the World Were a Village of 100 People ...

If we could reduce the world’s population to a village of precisely 100 people, with all existing human ratios remaining the same, the demographics would look something like this:

The village would have 60 Asians, 14 Africans, 12 Europeans, 8 Latin Americans, 5 from the USA and Canada, and 1 from the South Pacific

51 would be male, 49 would be female

82 would be non-white; 18 white

67 would be non-Christian; 33 would be Christian

80 would live in substandard housing

67 would be unable to read

50 would be malnourished and 1 dying of starvation

33 would be without access to a safe water supply

39 would lack access to improved sanitation

24 would not have any electricity (And of the 76 that dohave electricity, most would only use it for light at night.)

7 people would have access to the Internet

1 would have a college education

1 would have HIV

2 would be near birth; 1 near death

5 would control 32% of the entire world’s wealth; all 5 would be US citizens

33 would be receiving –and attempting to live on– only 3% of the income of “the village”

If to take a look at the world from this condensed perspective,the need for acceptance, understanding and education becomes evident.
Think of it!

If you woke up this morning with more health than sickness,you are luckier than the million that will not survive this week.

If you have never experienced a war,the loneliness of imprisonment,
an agony of tortures or a famine, you are happier, than 500 million persons in this world.

If you are able to go to church, mosque or synagogue without fear of harassment, arrest, torture or death, you are happier, than 3 billion persons in this world.

If there is a meal in your refrigerator,if you are dressed and have got shoes, if you have a bed and a roof above your head, you are better off, than 75% of people in this world.

If your parents are still alive and still married, then you are a rarity.

If you have a bank account, money in your purse, and there is some trifle in your coin box,
you belong to 8% of well-provided people in this world.

If you read this text, you are blessed because you do not belong to those 2 billion people who cannot read!!!

Woo! Hoo!

Finally, I have my very first blog on the internet! I feel sooooo special ... I really do! lol